Just Rannin' Around

Thursday, September 30, 2004

Sometimes I think if I can make my body go faster than my mind, I will not think about things. I did an excellent job of keeping myself busy yesterday. Work all day, off to do some visits, then to the gym. Run for 2 miles and than an hour on arms and legs. Home to do some laundary and clean the house. Me and my favorite pillow on the floor and out comes my study materials for the day. Phone rings, talk to my dad for a couple of hours. Wash my face, prayers and climb into bed. Knock on my door, 1:00 in the morning, listen and wipe some tears, give some hugs, calm some fears. Back down on my knees for the second time to ask for blessings of comfort, love, strength, and knowledge for those who are hurting and to express some gratitude for the opportunity to do anything that I can to ease someone's pain. It isn't that I really have anything to do with helping the pain ease, but that I just love people. It doesn't matter what they are going through or what they have done. I may dislike the act, but I still love the person. If I really listen to my heart I know the divinity that each of us possess and though there may be a mistake made, it is not for me to judge. All that I am to do is love and care. After all, I have made more than my fair share of mistakes which has caused me to lose things that I still care about. Sometimes it is hard to take a person out of the mistake after it has been made. By that I mean that becomes how you see that person from that point on rather than realizing that it was a mistake and by acknowledging, won't allow it to happen again. It is a matter of setting your mind and heart against the mistake and not the person that you love. So did I succeed in keeping myself from thinking yesterday? Of course I didn't. I just see things in a little bit of a different perspective. All I can do is love the people around me and ground myself in the most important relationship that I need to have in this life and be happy.

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