I haven’t ever been able to get it right.

It is amazing the skills that one can learn just by watching. Never has anyone ever taken me into the kitchen and taught me how to cook. Never has anyone sat down and said taste this and then tell me what ingredients are included. The only thing that I have been able to conclude is that I picked it up by watching women in my life that I truly admire while sitting on the counter discussing life and concerns with them while they were busily involved in preparing meals and treats.

There were so many skills that I learned at the feet of my mom, my grandmothers, my dad, my grandfathers. I watched them work. I watched them play. I watched them love. I took mental notes of the things that I wanted and things that I never wanted to duplicate. I have been enriched through the things that they taught me through observation. There is much to be said about being an example all the time for one can never be sure when one is being watching and by whom.

Realization that there are things that I have now not only observed in the generations preceding me, but in my own siblings which I have yet to accomplish is sometimes extremely discouraging. With every try I give it all that I know how. With every failure, I step back and try to determine which ingredients I am missing in obtaining the right mixture. I have taken out some things and added a little more of this and a dash of that, but still to no avail and I still don’t know what I am missing. I think that I am slowly coming to the conclusion that this is just something that I can’t do right and it is time to stop trying.