"Sadness is easier because it's surrender." -Elizabethtown
I am generally a genuinely happy person. The last few months however, I have found it a struggle to keep from sinking into sadness. While watching Elizabethtown, the statement above struck me like a 2 x 4 in the back of the head and being a glutton for punishment, I immediately backed the movie up in order to make sure that I had heard correctly.
After I realized that indeed I had heard correctly, my mind began to analyze. Of course the first thing that occurred was a resounding denial of surrender by enlarging the drama surrounding my life. I wallowed for a few moments. Sure there was severing/major changing of friendships that I dearly miss. Sure there are serious family problems which I never would have imagined. Sure my world is spinning in circles with too many changes all at once that haven't yet landed. Sure I am not exactly where I want to be. Sure I am lonely which is why I don't allow myself to sit still. Sure…. Sure….. Sure….. Then I figuratively kicked my own butt for allowing such thoughts to, in essence, rule my life.
I then began thinking about each different situation with the frame of mind that is, thankfully, more typical for me….it just seems to have slipped into a space that I couldn't find for a while. There are three friendships that are becoming increasingly more solid and tied closer to my heart. My family has circled the wagons and we will fight this together, only making us closer. The world looks kind of cool and the possibilities are endless spinning. I may not be where I want to be, but I sure have done a lot of things that I never dreamt were within my grasp. Loneliness is going to be there. I need to allow myself to feel it, cry for a moment and then move forward. The point being: I have an abundance of blessings which need to be kept in my focus. It takes work to do so because sadness is easier, however happiness is exhilarating!
"A motto of the British Special Service Air Force is: 'Those who risk, win!'
A single green vine shoot is able to grow through cement.
The Pacific Northwestern salmon beats itself bloody on its quest to travel hundreds of miles upstream against the current, with a single purpose…..Sex, of course
But also…..Life!" -Elizabethtown